Reading Your Draft Aloud Using Peer Review and Using a Typed and Printed Copy Are All Examples of

Affiliate 12. Peer Review and Last Revisions

12.1 Revision

Learning Objectives

• Identify major areas of business concern in the draft essay during revising
• Employ peer reviews and checklists to assistance revising
• Revise your paper to improve organisation and cohesion
• Decide an appropriate manner and tone for your newspaper
• Revise to ensure that your tone is consequent
• Revise the commencement typhoon of your essay and produce a concluding typhoon

Revising and editing are the two tasks you undertake to significantly improve your essay. Both are very of import elements of the writing process. You may think that a completed get-go draft ways that little comeback is needed. However, even experienced writers demand to improve their drafts and rely on peers during revising and editing. You may know that athletes miss catches, fumble balls, or overshoot goals. Dancers forget steps, turn also slowly, or miss beats. For both athletes and dancers, the more than they practise, the stronger their performance will become. Web designers seek amend images, a more clever design, or a more appealing background for their spider web pages. Writing has the aforementioned chapters to profit from improvement and revision.

You lot should revise and edit in stages: do non expect to grab everything in one go. If each fourth dimension you review your essay you focus on a unlike aspect of construction, you lot will exist more likely to catch any mistakes or identify any issues. Throughout this chapter, you volition meet a number of checklists containing specific things to look for with each revision. For example, y'all will first await at how the overall paper and your ideas are organized.

In the 2d section of this chapter, you will focus more than on editing: correcting the mechanical problems. Also at the end of the chapter, y'all will see a comprehensive but more general list of things you should exist looking for.

Understanding the Purpose of Revising and Editing

Revising and editing allow you lot to examine two important aspects of your writing separately, so that you tin give each job your undivided attention.

When you revise , y'all take a 2d expect at your ideas. Yous might add, cut, move, or change information in lodge to brand your ideas clearer, more accurate, more than interesting, or more convincing.

When you edit , yous have a second look at how you expressed your ideas. You add or alter words. You fix any problems in grammer, punctuation, and sentence structure. You meliorate your writing manner. You make your essay into a polished, mature piece of writing, the end production of your all-time efforts.

Tip

How do you lot get the best out of your revisions and editing? Here are some strategies that writers have developed to expect at their starting time drafts from a fresh perspective. Effort them throughout the writing process; then keep using the ones that bring results.

Take a intermission. Yous are proud of what you wrote, but you lot might be besides close to it to brand changes. Gear up aside your writing for a few hours or even a day until you tin can wait at it objectively.

Ask someone you lot trust for feedback and constructive criticism.

Pretend you are ane of your readers. Are you satisfied or dissatisfied? Why?

For many people, the wordscritic,disquisitional, andcriticism provoke only negative feelings that make them chroma, mumble, or shout. However, equally a author and a thinker, you need to learn to be critical of yourself in a positive fashion and have high expectations for your piece of work. You too need to train your middle and trust your ability to fix what needs fixing. To do this, yous need to teach yourself where to wait.

Revising Your Paper: Organization , Cohesion , and Unity

When writing a research paper, it is easy to become overly focused on editorial details, such as the proper format for bibliographical entries. These details practise thing. However, earlier you begin to address them, it is important to spend time reviewing and revising the content of the paper.

A expert research newspaper is both organized and cohesive.Organisation means that your argument flows logically from one bespeak to the next.Cohesion means that the elements of your paper work together smoothly and naturally. In a cohesive research paper, information from inquiry is seamlessly integrated with the writer'southward ideas.

Revise to Improve Organization

When you revise to better organization, you wait at the flow of ideas throughout the essay equally a whole and within individual paragraphs. You check to see that your essay moves logically from the introduction to the body paragraphs to the conclusion, and that each department reinforces your thesis. Apply Checklist 12.1 : Revise for Organization to help y'all.

Checklist 12.1 : Revise for Organization

At the essay level

Does my introduction proceed conspicuously from the opening to the thesis?

Does each body paragraph take a clear principal idea that relates to the thesis?

Do the main ideas in the trunk paragraphs flow in a logical order? Is each paragraph connected to the one before it?

Do I need to add or revise topic sentences or transitions to make the overall menstruation of ideas clearer?

Does my conclusion summarize my primary ideas and revisit my thesis?

At the paragraph level

Does the topic sentence clearly state the main idea?

Exercise the details in the paragraph chronicle to the primary idea?

Practise I need to recast whatever sentences or add transitions to improve the flow of sentences?

Jorge reread his draft paragraph past paragraph. Every bit he read, he highlighted the primary idea of each paragraph then he could see whether his ideas proceeded in a logical gild. For the most function, the period of ideas was clear. Even so, he did detect that one paragraph did not have a clear main idea. It interrupted the flow of the writing. During revision, Jorge added a topic sentence that clearly connected the paragraph to the i that had preceded information technology. He besides added transitions to improve the flow of ideas from sentence to sentence.

Read the following paragraphs twice, the beginning fourth dimension without Jorge's changes, and the second time with them.

Cocky – practise Practice 12.1

Follow these steps to begin revising your paper's overall organization.

Print out a hard re-create of your paper. (Yous will use this for multiple self-practice exercises in this chapter.)

Read your newspaper paragraph by paragraph. Highlight your thesis and the topic sentence of each paragraph.

Using the thesis and topic sentences as starting points, outline the ideas you lot presented—but as y'all would do if you were outlining a chapter in a textbook. Do non expect at the outline you created during prewriting. You may write in the margins of your draft or create a formal outline on a separate sheet of paper.

Next, reread your newspaper more slowly, looking for how ideas menses from sentence to sentence. Identify places where calculation a transition or recasting a sentence would make the ideas menstruation more logically.

Review the topics on your outline. Is at that place a logical flow of ideas? Place any places where you may need to reorganize ideas.

Begin to revise your newspaper to amend organization. Outset with any major issues, such as needing to move an entire paragraph. Then proceed to minor revisions, such as adding a transitional phrase or tweaking a topic sentence so it connects ideas more than conspicuously.

Optional collaboration: P lease share your paper with a classmate. Repeat the six steps and accept notes on a split up piece of newspaper. Share and compare notes.

Tip

Writers choose transitions carefully to show the relationships between ideas—for instance, to make a comparison or elaborate on a signal with examples. Brand sure your transitions arrange your purpose and avert overusing the same ones.

Creating Coherence

Careful writers apply transitions to analyze how the ideas in their sentences and paragraphs are related. These words and phrases help the writing flow smoothly. Adding transitions is non the only manner to improve coherence, but they are often useful and give a mature experience to your essays. Earlier chapters have discussed using transitions for specific purposes in the planning of your writing.Tabular array 12.1: Common Transitional Words and Phrases groups many common transitions according to their purpose.

Tabular array 12.i: Common Transitional Words and Phrases Co-ordinate to Purpose

Transitions That Show Sequence or Time
after	before	later
afterward	before long	meanwhile
equally soon as	finally	side by side
at first	first, second, third	soon
at terminal	in the beginning place	then
Transitions That Evidence Position
in a higher place	across	at the bottom
at the acme	behind	below
beside	beyond	inside
nearly	adjacent to	opposite
to the left, to the right, to the side	nether	where
Transitions That Show a Decision
indeed	hence	in decision
in the last assay	therefore	thus
Transitions That Go on a Line of Thought
consequently	furthermore	additionally
because	also the fact	following this idea further
in addition	in the same mode	moreover
looking further	because…, it is clear that
Transitions That Modify a Line of Idea
but	yet	however
nevertheless	on the reverse	on the other hand
Transitions That Evidence Importance
above all	best	especially
in fact	more of import	>most of import
most	worst
Transitions That Introduce the Final Thoughts in a Paragraph or Essay
finally	last	in conclusion
almost of all	least of all	terminal of all
All Purpose Transitions to Open Paragraphs or to Connect Ideas Inside Paragraphs
admittedly	at this indicate	certainly
granted	it is truthful	generally speaking
in general	in this situation	no doubt
no one denies	obviously	of class
to be sure	undoubtedly	unquestionably
Transitions that Introduce Examples
for case	for instance	such equally
Transitions That Clarify the Order of Events or Steps
first, second, third	by and large, furthermore, finally	in the first place, also, last
in the get-go place, furthermore, finally	in the first place, likewise, lastly

When Mariah (who you were introduced to in Capacity five and 6) revised her essay for unity, she examined her paragraph about televisions to check for coherence. She looked for places where she needed to add a transition or peradventure reword the text to make the menstruum of ideas clear. In the version that follows, she has already deleted the sentences that were off topic.

Tip

Many writers make their revisions on a printed copy and then transfer them to the version on screen. They conventionally utilize a small arrow called a caret (^) to show where to insert an addition or correction.

Cocky – do Practise 12.ii

Respond the following questions about Mariah's revised paragraph.

Do you agree with the transitions and other changes that Mariah made to her paragraph? Which would y'all keep and which were unnecessary? Explain.

What transition words or phrases did Mariah add to her paragraph? Why did she cull each 1?

What result does adding additional sentences accept on the coherence of the paragraph? Explain. When you read both versions aloud, which version has a more logical flow of ideas? Explicate.

Revise to Improve Cohesion

When you revise to improve cohesion, you analyze how the parts of your newspaper work together. You look for anything that seems bad-mannered or out of identify. Revision may involve deleting unnecessary fabric or rewriting parts of the paper so that the out of place material fits in smoothly.

In a research paper, problems with cohesion usually occur when a writer has problem integrating source material. If facts or quotations take been awkwardly dropped into a paragraph, they distract or misfile the reader instead of working to support the writer's point. Overusing paraphrased and quoted material has the same upshot. Use Checklist 12.2 : Revise for Cohesion to review your essay for cohesion.

Checklist 12.2 : Revise for Cohesion

Does the opening of the paper clearly connect to the broader topic and thesis? Brand sure entertaining quotes or anecdotes serve a purpose.

Have I included back up from inquiry for each main point in the torso of my newspaper?

Have I included introductory material before any quotations? Quotations should never stand alone in a paragraph.

Does paraphrased and quoted material clearly serve to develop my own points?

Do I need to add to or revise parts of the paper to help the reader understand how certain data from a source is relevant?

Are there whatsoever places where I have overused material from sources?

Does my conclusion make sense based on the rest of the paper? Brand sure whatever new questions or suggestions in the conclusion are clearly linked to earlier material.

As Jorge reread his draft, he looked to see how the different pieces fit together to bear witness his thesis. He realized that some of his supporting information needed to be integrated more carefully and decided to omit some details entirely. Read the following paragraph, first without Jorge's revisions and so with them.

Jorge decided that his comment about pizza and birthday cake came across equally subjective and was not necessary to make his betoken, and so he deleted it. He also realized that the quotation at the end of the paragraph was awkward and ineffective. How would his readers know who Kwon was or why her opinion should be taken seriously? Adding an introductory phrase helped Jorge integrate this quotation smoothly and establish the credibility of his source.

Self – practice Exercise 12.3

Follow these steps to begin revising your newspaper to improve cohesion.

Print out a hard re-create of your paper, or work with your printout fromSelf – Exercise Exercise 12.1.

Read the body paragraphs of your paper outset. Each time yous come to a identify that cites data from sources, inquire yourself what purpose this data serves. Check that it helps support a indicate and that it is clearly related to the other sentences in the paragraph.

Place unnecessary information from sources that you can delete.

Identify places where you need to revise your writing so that readers understand the significance of the details cited from sources.

Skim the body paragraphs over again, looking for any paragraphs that seem packed with citations. Review these paragraphs carefully for cohesion.

Review your introduction and conclusion. Make sure the information presented works with ideas in the body of the paper.

Revise the places you lot identified in your paper to amend cohesion.

Optional c ollaboration: P charter commutation papers with a classmate. Complete step 4 . On a dissever piece of newspaper, annotation any areas that would benefit from clarification. Render and compare notes.

Writing at Piece of work

Agreement cohesion can besides benefit you in the workplace, especially when you accept to write and deliver a presentation. Speakers sometimes rely on cute graphics or funny quotations to hold their audience'southward attention. If you cull to use these elements, make sure they piece of work well with the substantive content of your presentation. For example, if you are asked to requite a financial presentation, and the financial report shows that the visitor lost money, funny illustrations would not be relevant or advisable for the presentation.

Tip

Reading your writing aloud will often assist yous notice bug with unity and coherence. Heed for the clarity and flow of your ideas. Identify places where you find yourself confused, and write a notation to yourself about possible fixes.

Creating Unity

Sometimes writers get caught up in the moment and cannot resist a good digression. Even though y'all might enjoy such detours when you chat with friends, unplanned digressions usually impairment a piece of writing.

Following your outline closely offers yous a reasonable guarantee that your writing will stay on purpose and not migrate away from the controlling thought. However, when writers are rushed, are tired, or cannot find the right words, their writing may become less than they want information technology to be. Their writing may no longer exist clear and concise, and they may add information that is not needed to develop the main thought.

When a piece of writing hasunity, all the ideas in each paragraph and in the unabridged essay conspicuously vest and are arranged in an order that makes logical sense. When the writing hascoherence, the ideas catamenia smoothly. The wording clearly indicates how one idea leads to some other within a paragraph and from paragraph to paragraph.

Mariah stayed close to her outline when she drafted the three body paragraphs of her essay she tentatively titled "Digital Technology: The Newest and the Best at What Toll?" Merely a recent shopping trip for an HDTV upset her plenty that she digressed from the main topic of her third paragraph and included comments about the sales staff at the electronics store she visited. When she revised her essay, she deleted the off-topic sentences that affected the unity of the paragraph.

Read the following paragraph twice, the first time without Mariah's changes and the 2nd time with them.

Self – practice Exercise 12.4

Answer the following 2 questions nearly Mariah'due south paragraph:

Exercise you concur with Mariah's decision to brand the deletions she made? Did she cut too much, besides niggling, or just enough? Explain.

Is the explanation of what screen resolution means a digression? Or is it audience friendly and essential to understanding the paragraph? Explain.

Collaboration: P charter share with a classmate and compare your answers.

Now, print out another copy of your essay or use the printed version(s) you used in Self – Do Exercises 12.one and 12.3 . Reread it to find whatsoever statements that affect the unity of your writing. Make up one's mind how best to revise.

Tip

When you reread your writing to find revisions to make, look for each type of problem in a separate sweep. Read information technology directly through once to locate any problems with unity. Read it direct through a 2nd time to detect problems with coherence. You may follow this same practice during many stages of the writing process.

Writing at Work

Many companies hire re-create editors and proofreaders to help them produce the cleanest possible final drafts of big writing projects. Re-create editors are responsible for suggesting revisions and style changes; proofreaders check documents for whatsoever errors in capitalization, spelling, and punctuation that accept crept in. Many times, these tasks are done on a freelance basis, with one freelancer working for a variety of clients.

Using a Consequent Style and Tone

Once yous are certain that the content of your paper fulfills your purpose, you can begin revising to improvestyle andtone. Together, your fashion and tone create the voice of your paper, or how you come across to readers. Style refers to the way y'all use language as a writer—the judgement structures you use and the give-and-take choices you make. Tone is the attitude toward your subject and audience that you convey through your discussion selection.

Determining an Appropriate Fashion and Tone

Although accepted writing styles will vary within different disciplines, the underlying goal is the same—to come across to your readers as a knowledgeable, authoritative guide. Writing nigh enquiry is like being a tour guide who walks readers through a topic. A stuffy, overly formal tour guide can brand readers experience put off or intimidated. Also much informality or humour tin make readers wonder whether the tour guide really knows what he or she is talking nearly. Extreme or emotionally charged language comes across as unbalanced.

To aid forestall being overly formal or informal, determine an appropriate style and tone at the beginning of the research procedure. Consider your topic and audition because these can help dictate manner and tone. For example, a newspaper on new breakthroughs in cancer research should exist more than formal than a newspaper on ways to get a good nighttime's slumber.

A stiff inquiry newspaper comes beyond equally straightforward, appropriately academic, and serious. It is mostly all-time to avoid writing in the first person, every bit this tin brand your paper seem overly subjective and opinion based. Use Checklist 12.3 : Revise for Style to review your paper for other bug that affect style and tone. Yous tin can check for consistency at the end of the writing process. Checking for consistency is discussed later in this section.

Checklist 12.iii : Revise for Way

My newspaper avoids excessive wordiness.

My sentences are varied in length and structure.

I have avoided using outset person pronouns such every bit I and we.

I accept used the agile voice whenever possible.

I take defined specialized terms that might be unfamiliar to readers.

I have used clear, straightforward linguistic communication whenever possible and avoided unnecessary jargon.

My paper states my point of view using a counterbalanced tone—neither too indecisive nor too forceful.

Discussion Choice

Note that word choice is an especially important aspect of style. In improver to checking the points noted on Checklist 12.3, review your paper to brand sure your language is precise, conveys no unintended connotations, and is free of bias. Here are some of the points to bank check for:

Vague or imprecise terms

Slang

Repetition of the aforementioned phrases ("Smith states…, Jones states…") to introduce quoted and paraphrased material (For a total listing of strong verbs to use with in text citations, seeChapter 9: Citations and Referencing.)

Exclusive use of masculine pronouns or awkward apply ofhe or she

Utilise of linguistic communication with negative connotations, such as haughty or ridiculous

Use of outdated or offensive terms to refer to specific ethnic, racial, or religious groups

Tip

Using plural nouns and pronouns or recasting a sentence can help you keep your linguistic communication gender neutral while avoiding awkwardness. Consider the following examples.

• Gender biased : When a writer cites a source in the body of his newspaper, he must listing it on his references page.
• Awkward : When a author cites a source in the torso of his or her newspaper, he or she must list it on his or her references page.
• Improved : Writers must list any sources cited in the body of a paper on the references folio.

Keeping Your Fashion Consistent

As you lot revise your paper, brand sure your mode is consistent throughout. Expect for instances where a word, phrase, or sentence does not seem to fit with the rest of the writing. It is best to reread for style later on you have completed the other revisions and so that you are not distracted by whatsoever larger content issues. Revising strategies y'all can utilise include the following:

Read your paper aloud. Sometimes your ears catch inconsistencies that your eyes miss.

Share your paper with another reader whom y'all trust to give you honest feedback. Information technology is frequently difficult to evaluate one'south ain style objectively—especially in the final phase of a challenging writing project. Another reader may be more likely to notice instances of wordiness, disruptive linguistic communication, or other issues that impact style and tone.

E dit your paper slowly, judgement by judgement. You may even wish to use a canvas of paper to cover upward everything on the page except the paragraph yous are editing. This practise forces you to read slowly and advisedly. Marking whatsoever areas where y'all notice issues in style or tone, and so take time to rework those sections.

On reviewing his paper, Jorge found that he had generally used an appropriately academic way and tone. However, he noticed ane glaring exception—his start paragraph. He realized at that place were places where his overly breezy writing could come across as unserious or, worse, disparaging. Revising his word selection and omitting a humorous aside helped Jorge maintain a consistent tone. Read his revisions.

Cocky – practice Practice 12.five

Using Checklist 12.3 : Revise for Style , revise your paper line by line. You may use either of these techniques:

Print out a difficult copy of your paper or work with your printout fromSelf – Practice Exercise 12.1. Read information technology line by line. Check for the problems noted on Checklist 12.iii, too as whatever other aspects of your writing way you have previously identified as areas for comeback. Marker any areas where you lot notice problems in fashion or tone, and then take time to rework those sections.

If y'all prefer to piece of work with an electronic document, utilise the bill of fare options in your discussion processing program to enlarge the text to 150 or 200 percent of the original size. Make certain the type is large enough that you lot can focus on one paragraph at a fourth dimension. Read the paper line by line as described in step 1. Highlight any areas where you lot notice problems in mode or tone, and then take time to rework those sections.

Optional c ollaboration: P charter exchange papers with a classmate. On a separate piece of newspaper, notation places where the essay does not seem to menstruation or you have questions about what was written. Return the essay and compare notes.

Completing a Peer Review

Later on working and then closely with a piece of writing, writers ofttimes need to step back and ask for a more objective reader. What writers need almost is feedback from readers who can answer merely to the words on the page. When they are ready, writers show their drafts to someone they respect and who can give an honest response nigh its strengths and weaknesses.

You, too, tin ask a peer to read your draft when it is set. Subsequently evaluating the feedback and assessing what is nigh helpful, the reader's feedback will help yous when you revise your typhoon. This process is chosenpeer review.

You lot tin work with a partner in your class and identify specific ways to strengthen each other'due south essays. Although you may be uncomfortable sharing your writing at first, call up that each writer is working toward the same goal: a last draft that fits the audience and the purpose. Maintaining a positive mental attitude when providing feedback will put you lot and your partner at ease. The box that follows provides a useful framework for the peer review session.

Questions for Peer Review: Arrangement, Unity, and Coherence

Title of essay: ____________________________________________

Engagement: ____________________________________________

Author's name: ____________________________________________

Peer reviewer's proper noun: _________________________________________

This essay is about____________________________________________.

Your main points in this essay are____________________________________________.

What I most liked nigh this essay is____________________________________________.

These three points struck me as your strongest:

Signal: ____________________________________________
Why: ____________________________________________

Point: ____________________________________________
Why: ____________________________________________

Point: ____________________________________________
Why: ____________________________________________

These places in your essay are non clear to me:

Where: ____________________________________________
Needs improvement because__________________________________________

Where: ____________________________________________
Needs improvement considering ____________________________________________

Where: ____________________________________________

Needs improvement because ____________________________________________

The one boosted change you could make that would improve this essay significantly is ____________________________________________.

Writing at Work

One of the reasons why word processing programs build in a reviewing feature is that work groups take become a mutual feature in many businesses. Writing is often collaborative, and the members of a work grouping and their supervisors often critique group members' work and offer feedback that will lead to a better final product.

Cocky – practice Practise 12.six

Substitution essays with a classmate and complete a peer review of each other's draft in progress. Remember to give positive feedback and to exist courteous and polite in your responses. Focus on providing ane positive comment and i question for more data to the author.

Using Feedback Objectively

The purpose of peer feedback is to receive constructive criticism of your essay. Your peer reviewer is your first real audition, and you lot accept the opportunity to acquire what confuses and delights a reader so that you can improve your work before sharing the concluding draft with a wider audience (or your intended audience).

Information technology may not be necessary to contain every recommendation your peer reviewer makes. However, if you start to observe a pattern in the responses you receive from peer reviewers, you might desire to consider that feedback in time to come assignments. For case, if you read consistent comments about a need for more research, then you may want to consider including more inquiry in future assignments.

Using Feedback from Multiple Sources

Y'all might go feedback from more than ane reader as you share different stages of your revised draft. In this situation, you may receive feedback from readers who do non understand the assignment or who lack your involvement with and enthusiasm for information technology.

You need to evaluate the responses you receive according to two of import criteria:

Determine if the feedback supports the purpose of the assignment.

Determine if the suggested revisions are appropriate to the audience.

Then, using these standards, have or decline revision feedback.

Self – practice Exercise 12.seven

Consider the feedback you lot received from the peer review and all of the revision exercises throughout this section. Compile a terminal draft of your revisions that y'all can use in the next section to complete your final edits.

Central Takeaways

• Revising and editing are the stages of the writing procedure in which you amend your work before producing a terminal draft.
• Unity in writing means that all the ideas in each paragraph and in the entire essay clearly belong together and are arranged in an order that makes logical sense.
• Coherence in writing means that the writer'due south wording clearly indicates how i idea leads to another within a paragraph and betwixt paragraphs.
• Transitional words and phrases effectively make writing more than coherent.
• Writing should be articulate and concise, with no unnecessary words.
• Constructive formal writing uses specific, appropriate words and avoids slang, contractions, clichés, and overly general words.
• Peer reviews, washed properly, tin can give writers objective feedback about their writing. It is the writer's responsibleness to evaluate the results of peer reviews and incorporate only useful feedback.

12.2 Editing and Developing a Final Draft of a Inquiry Paper

Learning Objectives

• Edit your paper to ensure that language, citations, and formatting are correct

Given all the time and effort you have put into your research newspaper, you volition want to make sure that your final draft represents your best work. This requires taking the time to revise and edit your paper carefully.

You lot may feel like you need a break from your paper before yous edit it. That feeling is understandable, so you want to exist certain to leave yourself enough fourth dimension to consummate this important stage of the writing process. This section presents a number of opportunities for you to focus on different aspects of the editing process; as with revising a draft, you lot should approach editing in different stages.

Some of the content in this section may seem repetitive, but again, it provides you lot with a chance to double-check any revisions you lot have made at a detailed level.

Editing Your Typhoon

If y'all have been incorporating each set of revisions equally Mariah and Jorge have, you have produced multiple drafts of your writing. Then far, all your changes have been content changes. Perhaps with the help of peer feedback, you have fabricated sure that you lot sufficiently supported your ideas. You have checked for bug with unity and coherence. Y'all take examined your essay for word choice, revising to cut unnecessary words and to replace weak wording with specific and advisable wording.

The next pace after revising the content is editing. When you edit, you examine the surface features of your text. You examine your spelling, grammar, usage, and punctuation. You also make sure you apply the proper format when creating your finished assignment.

Tip

Editing takes fourth dimension. Be sure to budget time into the writing procedure to complete boosted edits later revising. Editing and proofreading your writing helps you lot create a finished work that represents your all-time efforts. Here are a few more tips to call up about your readers:

Readers do non notice correct spelling, just theydo notice misspellings.

Readers wait past your sentences to get to your ideas—unless the sentences are awkward, poorly constructed, and frustrating to read.

Readers observe when every sentence has the aforementioned rhythm every bit every other sentence, with no variety.

Readers do not cheer when you usethere,their, andthey're correctly, but they notice when you do non.

Readers will discover the care with which you lot handled your assignment and your attention to item in the delivery of an error-free document.

Beingness Clear and Curtailed

Some writers are very methodical and painstaking when they write a first typhoon. Other writers unleash a lot of words in order to get out all that they feel they need to say. Do either of these methods match your style? Or is your composing way somewhere in between? No affair which description best fits you, the first draft of almost every slice of writing, no matter its author, tin be made clearer and more than curtailed.

If you take a tendency to write too much, you lot will demand to look for unnecessary words. If y'all have a tendency to be vague or imprecise in your wording, you volition demand to find specific words to replace any overly full general language.

Identifying Wordiness

Sometimes writers utilise also many words when fewer words will appeal more than to their audience and better fit their purpose. Here are some common examples of wordiness to look for in your draft. Eliminating wordiness helps all readers, because it makes your ideas clear, direct, and straightforward.

• Sentences that brainstorm withThere isorThere are
• Wordy . There are two major experiments that the Biology Department sponsors.
• Revised . The Biological science Department sponsors ii major experiments.
• Sentences with unnecessary modifiers
• Wordy . Two extremely famous and well-known consumer advocates spoke eloquently in favour of the proposed important legislation.
• Revised . 2 well-known consumer advocates spoke in favour of the proposed legislation.

Sentences with deadwood phrases that add footling to the meaning. Be judicious when you employ phrases such asin terms of,with a mind to,on the subject of,as to whether or not,more or less,as far equally…is concerned, and like expressions. You can normally discover a more than straightforward mode to land your point.

• Wordy . Equally a world leader in the field of green applied science, the company plans to focus its efforts in the area of geothermal energy. A study equally to whether or not to utilise geysers as an energy source is in the process of preparation.
• Revised . Every bit a world leader in green technology, the company plans to focus on geothermal energy. Researchers are preparing a written report about using geysers as an free energy source.

Sentences in the passive voice or with forms of the verbto be : Sentences with passive voice verbs frequently create confusion because the subject of the judgement does not perform an action. Sentences are clearer when the discipline performs the action and is followed by a strong verb. Employ strong agile voice verbs in place of forms ofto be, which can lead to wordiness. Avoid passive voice when you tin.

• Wordy . Information technology might maybe exist said that using a GPS device is something that is a benefit to drivers who have a poor sense of direction.
• Revised . Using a GPS device benefits drivers who accept a poor sense of direction.

Sentences with constructions that tin can be shortened

• Wordy . The e-volume reader, which is a recent invention, may get as commonplace every bit the cell telephone. My over-60 uncle bought an e-book reader, and his married woman bought an east-book reader, too.
• Revised . The e-book reader, a contempo invention, may become as commonplace as the prison cell phone. My over-60 uncle and his wife both bought east-book readers.

Choosing Specific, Appropriate Words

Most essays at the post-secondary level should be written in formal English language suitable for an academic situation. Follow these principles to be sure that your give-and-take choice is appropriate. For more data about give-and-take option, seeChapter 2: Working with Words: Which Word Is Right?

Avoid slang . Find alternatives tobummer,kewl, andrad.

Avoid language that is overly casual . Write about "men and women" rather than "girls and guys" unless you are trying to create a specific effect. A formal tone calls for formal language.

Avert contractions . Usedo not in place ofdon't,I am in identify ofI'chiliad,have not in identify ofhaven't, and so on. Contractions are considered casual speech.

Avoid clichés . Overused expressions such asgreen with green-eyed,confront the music,better belatedly than never, and similar expressions are empty of meaning and may not appeal to your audience.

Be conscientious when you use words that sound alike simply have different meanings . Some examples areallusion/illusion; complement/compliment; council/counsel; concurrent/consecutive; founder/flounder; and historic/historical. When in doubt, check a dictionary.

Choose words with the connotations you want . Choosing a word for its connotations is as important in formal essay writing as it is in all kinds of writing. Compare the positive connotations of the discussionproud and the negative connotations ofarrogant andconceited.

Use specific words rather than overly full general words . Observe synonyms forthing,people,nice,good,bad,interesting, and other vague words. Or apply specific details to make your verbal meaning clear.

Now read the revisions Mariah made to make her third paragraph clearer and more concise. She has already incorporated the changes she made to improve unity and coherence.

Self – practice Practice 12.8

Answer the following questions about Mariah's revised paragraph:

Read the unrevised and the revised paragraphs aloud. Explain in your ain words how changes in word selection have affected Mariah'due south writing.

Do you agree with the changes that Mariah made to her paragraph? Which changes would yous go along and which were unnecessary? Explain. What other changes would you have made?

What effect does removing contractions and the pronoun ^y'all have on the tone of the paragraph? How would you characterize the tone at present? Why?

Now render once more to your essay in progress. Read carefully for problems with word pick. Be sure that your draft is written in formal language and that your word choice is specific and appropriate.

Cocky – practice Practise 12.9

R eturn once more to the first draft of the essay yous have been revising. Cheque it for unnecessary words.

Try making your sentences as curtailed as they can exist.

Brief Punctuation Review

Throughout this book, y'all have been presented with a number of tables containing transitional words. Table 12.2: Punctuating Transitional Words and Phrases shows many of the transition words you have seen organized into unlike categories to help you know how to punctuate with each one.

Tabular array 12.2: Punctuating Transitional Words and Phrases

Joining Independent Clauses (coordination)
two IND	Coordinating conjunctions: FANBOYS		Conjunctive adverbs and other transitional expressions
IND ; IND	IND , ____ IND		IND . _____, IND or IND ; _____, IND
	for		accordingly		after all
	and		later a while		also
	nor		anyhow		equally a outcome
	but		at any charge per unit		at the same time
	or		too		consequently
	still		for case		for case
	so		furthermore		hence
			henceforth		however
			in addition		indeed
			in fact		in other words
			in item		instead
			in the first place		likewise
			meanwhile		moreover
			withal		even so
			on the opposite		on the other hand
			otherwise		all the same
			and then		therefore
			thus
Forming Dependent Clauses (subordination)
IND + DEP or DEP , IND
afterwards	although	as		as if		as though
because	before	if		in order that		since
so that	that	though		unless		until
when	whenever	where		wherever
*which	while	who		whom		whose

* This row contains relative pronouns, which may be punctuated differently.

Joining Independent Clauses

There are 3 ways to bring together independent clauses. By using a mix of all three methods and varying your transition words, you volition add together complexity to your writing and better the menses. Y'all will also be emphasizing to your reader which ideas you want to connect or to show things like crusade and effect or contrast. For a more than detailed review of contained clauses, look back at Affiliate 3: Putting Ideas into Your Own Words and Paragraphs. Option 1 By merely using a semicolon (;), you tin make the ideas connect more than if y'all were to use a period. If yous are trying to reinforce that connection, employ a semicolon considering information technology is not as strong of a pause every bit a menstruum and reinforces the link. Option 2 When you want to link two independent sentences and increase the catamenia between ideas, you tin add a comma and a coordinating conjunction between them. With coordinating conjunctions (FANBOYS: for, and, nor, but, or, yet, so), yous exercise non apply a comma every time: you would only do and then if what is on either side of the conjunction is a complete sentence not only a phrase. You would not put a comma if you are only giving a list of two items. For example:

Comma:It is cold outside, so I wore an extra warm coat.

No comma: It is common cold outside. I wore an extra warm coat and gloves.

The first case contains a complete sentence (independent clause) on either side of the conjunction so. Just the conjunction by itself or simply a comma by itself is not strong enough to bring together ii independent clauses. However, if you put the two together with so, you can link the 2. In the second example, and is simply connecting two noun phrases: warm coat and gloves. What comes later the conjunction is not a complete judgement, so you lot would not add a comma. To bank check if in that location is a consummate, independent clause, ask yourself, "Tin that part stand past itself as a complete judgement?" In the instance of the no comma case, gloves is what comes after the comma. That is not a consummate sentence, only a noun: that means it is part of a list and is non a consummate judgement = no comma. The indicate of these examples was to show you that you take to be conscientious how y'all use commas and conjunctions. As easy as it would exist to only always toss in a comma, doing so would misfile your reader as what is and is not role of a list and what ideas are joined. Option 3 Your third choice is to join two independent clauses with a conjunctive adverb or another transition discussion. These words are very useful considering they clearly show your reader how you would similar your ideas to connect. If you wanted to emphasize contrasting ideas, you lot would use on the other hand or however. If you wanted to bear witness cause and effect, yous could use equally a event. Refer to the tables you take seen in other capacity to make sure you are using the transitions you lot actually hateful to be using; so, check Table 12.2 to confirm how y'all should punctuate information technology. After your first independent clause, yous tin choose to either use a flow or a semicolon, once more depending on how much of a link you want to bear witness. You may also want to consider how many long sentences yous have used prior to this. If yous use a lot of complicated sentences, you should probably use a menstruation to allow your reader to accept a break. You must also retrieve to include a comma after the transition give-and-take.

Period:It is cold exterior. Therefore, I wore an extra warm coat.

Semicolon: It is cold outside; therefore, I wore an actress warm coat.

Joining Dependent Clauses

If ane of the clauses in a judgement is contained and can stand on its own, but the other is non, yous have to construct the sentence a little differently. Whenever yous add a subordinating conjunction or relative pronoun to an independent judgement, you create a dependent clause—i that can never stand alone. In the examples below, notice that when the contained clause comes first, it is stiff enough to behave the dependent clause at the terminate without any helping punctuation. However, if you desire the dependent clause first, you must add a comma between it and the independent clause: the dependent clause is not stiff enough to back up the independent clause after without a little help. In the examples beneath, the independent clauses are double underlined and the dependent clause has a single underline.

IND offset:I wore an extra warm coat as it is cold exterior.

DEP get-go: Every bit information technology is cold outside, I wore an extra warm coat.

Tip

If you lot desire to commencement a judgement with Because, you need to brand sure at that place is a second one-half to that sentence that is independent. A Because (dependent) clause can never stand by itself.

At the bottom on Table 12.2, you can see a list of five dependent markers that can be used a piddling differently. These are relative pronouns, and when you use them, you need to ask yourself if the information is 100 pct necessary for the reader to understand what you are describing. If it is optional, you can include a comma before the relative clause even if information technology comes afterwards the independent clause.

Not – essential:Equally information technology is common cold exterior, I wore an extra warm coat, which was blueish.

Essential: My coat which is blue is the one I vesture when information technology is actually cold outside.

In the non – essential example, the fact that the glaze was warm was probably more than of import than that the coat was blueish. The data that the glaze is blue probably would not make a difference in keeping the person warm, so the data in that relative clause is not terribly important. Adding the comma before the clause tells the reader information technology is extra information. In the essential example, the use of the aforementioned clause without a preceding comma shows that this information is of import. The writer is implying he has other coats that are non as warm and are not blue, so he is emphasizing the importance of the blueish coat. These are the but five subordinators, or relative pronouns, for which you lot can do this; every other one needs to follow the previous caption of how to use these dependent transition words. If you do make up one's mind to add a comma with 1 of the relative pronouns, you need to think critically about whether or not that description is completely essential.

Using any of these sentence joining strategies is helpful in providing sentence variety to help your reader stay engaged and reading attentively. By following these punctuation rules, y'all will also avert creating sentence fragments, run-on sentences, and comma splices, all of which improves your end product.

Given how much work you have put into your research paper, you will want to check for any errors that could distract or confuse your readers. Using the spell checking feature in your word processing program can be helpful, it should not replace a full, careful review of your document. Be sure to check for whatever errors that may have come up frequently for you in the past. Use Checklist 12.4: Editing Your Writing to aid you as you edit.

Checklist 12.4 : Editing Your Writing

Grammer

Are some sentences actually sentence fragments?

Are some sentences run-on? How can I right them?

Practise some sentences need conjunctions between independent clauses?

Does every verb agree with its field of study?

Is every verb in the correct tense?

Are tense forms, especially for irregular verbs, written correctly?

Have I used discipline, object, and possessive personal pronouns correctly?

Accept I usedwho andwhom correctly?

Is the ancestor of every pronoun clear?

Exercise all personal pronouns agree with their antecedents?

Have I used the correct comparative and superlative forms of adjectives and adverbs?

Is it articulate which discussion a participial phrase modifies, or is it a dangling modifier?

Sentence Structure

Are all my sentences unproblematic sentences, or practise I vary my sentence structure?

Take I chosen the best coordinating or subordinating conjunctions to join clauses?

Have I created long, overpacked sentences that should be shortened for clarity?

Do I see any mistakes in parallel structure?

Punctuation

Does every sentence stop with the correct end punctuation?

Tin I justify the use of every assertion point?

Have I used apostrophes correctly to write all singular and plural possessive forms?

Accept I used quotation marks correctly?

Mechanics and Usage

Tin I discover any spelling errors? How tin I correct them?

Have I used upper-case letter letters where they are needed?

Have I written abbreviations, where immune, correctly?

Can I find any errors in the utilise of commonly confused words, such as to/too/ii?

Tip

Be careful about relying besides much on spelling checkers and grammar checkers. A spelling checker cannot recognize that you meant to write principle but wroteprincipal instead. A grammer checker ofttimes queries constructions that are perfectly correct. The program does not sympathize your pregnant; it makes its check against a full general set of formulas that might not use in each instance. If you use a grammar checker, accept the suggestions that brand sense, but consider why the suggestions came up.

Tip

Proofreading requires patience; information technology is very easy to read past a error. Set your paper aside for at least a few hours, if not a day or more, so your mind will rest. Some professional proofreaders read a text backward and then they tin concentrate on spelling and punctuation. Another helpful technique is to slowly read a paper aloud, paying attending to every word, letter, and punctuation mark.

If yous need boosted proofreading assistance, enquire a reliable friend, classmate, or peer tutor to make a final pass on your paper to look for anything y'all missed.

Formatting

Your finished assignment should be properly formatted, post-obit the style required of you. Formatting includes the fashion of the title, margin size, page number placement, location of the author'south proper name, and other factors. Your instructor or department may require a specific style to be used. The requirements may be more than detailed and rigid for enquiry projects and term papers, which often discover the American Psychological Association (APA) style guide, especially when citations of sources are included.

To ensure the format is right and follows whatever specific instructions, make a final bank check before you submit an assignment.

Cocky- exercise EXERCISE 12.ten

With the assistance of Checklist 12.4, edit and proofread your essay.

Checking Citations and Formatting

When editing a research newspaper, information technology is likewise important to check that you have cited sources properly and formatted your document co-ordinate to the specified guidelines. In that location are two reasons for this. Starting time, citing sources correctly ensures that you requite proper credit to other people for ideas and information that helped you in your work. Second, using correct formatting establishes your paper every bit one student'south contribution to the work developed past and for a larger bookish customs. Increasingly, American Psychological Association (APA) mode guidelines are the standard for many academic fields. Use Checklist 12.5: Citations and Formatting to help.

Checklist 12.v : Citations and Formatting

Within the body of my paper, each fact or idea taken from a source is credited to the correct source.

Each in-text citation includes the source author'south name (or, where applicable, the organization name or source title) and yr of publication. I have used the correct format of in text and parenthetical citations.

Each source cited in the torso of my paper has a corresponding entry in the references department of my paper.

My references section includes a heading and double-spaced alphabetized entries.

Each entry in my references department is indented on the 2d line and all subsequent lines.

Each entry in my references section includes all the necessary information for that source type, in the correct sequence and format.

My paper includes a title page.

My newspaper includes a running head.

The margins of my paper are set at one inch. Text is double spaced and set in a standard 12-point font.

For detailed guidelines on APA citation and formatting, seeChapter 9: Citations and Referencing.

Writing at Work

Following APA commendation and formatting guidelines may require time and try. However, it is good practice for learning how to follow accepted conventions in any professional field. Many big corporations create a style transmission with guidelines for editing and formatting documents produced by that corporation. Employees follow the style manual when creating internal documents and documents for publication.

During the procedure of revising and editing, Jorge fabricated changes in the content and style of his paper. He also gave the paper a final review to bank check for overall correctness and, particularly, correct APA citations and formatting. Read the final draft of his paper.

With the help of Checklist 12.5, edit and proofread your essay.

Although y'all probably practise non desire to look at your newspaper again before you submit it to your instructor, take the time to do a final check. Since yous have already worked through all of the checklists above focusing on certain aspects at ane fourth dimension, working through one final checklist should confirm you take written a potent, persuasive essay and that everything is the manner you want information technology to be. As extra insurance you have produced a stiff newspaper, y'all may even desire someone else to double-check your essay using C hecklist 12.half dozen: Last Revision. Then you lot can compare to see how your perceptions of your newspaper match those of someone else, essentially having that person act every bit the one who will be grading your paper.

Checklist 12.6: Final Revision

First Revision i : Organisation
___	Exercise you evidence you lot understand the assignment: purpose, audience, and genre?
___	Focus: Accept you clearly stated your thesis (your controlling thought) in the first paragraph?
___	Does your thesis statement catch the reader'due south attention?
___	Unity: Write your opening and closing paragraphs and place each topic sentence in betwixt. You should have a "mini essay" with several dissimilar main points supporting your thesis.
___	Are your paragraphs organized in a logical manner?
___ ___	Does each topic judgement (per paragraph) logically follow the ane preceding it?
	Do you have several points to support your thesis?
___ ___ ___	Check whether your paragraphs are organized according to a specific pattern.
	Would rearranging your paragraphs support your thesis better?
	Accept yous provided a comprehensive determination to your essay? Does information technology summarize your master points (using different words)?
Outset Revision 2 : Paragraphs and Sentences
___ ___ ___ ___ ___   ___ ___ ___   ___   ___	Does each paragraph have main points and supporting details?
	Does each paragraph accept only ane main bespeak?
	Is your arroyo or design used to develop your paragraph'southward master signal followed?
	Bank check that each sentence is relevant to the main point of the paragraph.
	Are at that place several sentences giving details, facts, quotes, reasons, and arguments in each paragraph?
	Is each supporting item specific, physical, and relevant to the topic judgement?
	Does each sentence logically follow the preceding one?
	Have you used transitional words to assistance the reader follow your thoughts? If not, add them.
	Paragraph length: If as well short, develop further. If too long, break into smaller paragraphs or consolidate some sentences.
	Check your essay for tone and betoken of view.
Second Revision 1 : Sentences and Usage
___ ___ ___ ___	Confirm that each sentence has a subject and a verb.
	Revise fragments, splices, and run-on sentences.
	Check modifiers to see if they have been put in unclear places.
	Do y'all have a diversity of sentence structures? (simple and circuitous)
___ ___   ___ ___ ___	Scan for subject-verb agreement in each sentence.
	Are you consistent with your verb tenses? Check to brand sure there are not whatever disruptive or irrelevant tense changes.
	Make sure that words in lists are in parallel forms.
	Call back through your pronouns; what is each one referring to?
	Cheque for disruptive "person" shifts within paragraphs. Keep the subjects consistent.
___ ___ ___ ___   ___	Identify all verbs and change any that are passive to active.
	Use strong verbs not weak adverbs. Say something "is" not that it "may be."
	Check for wordiness.
	Scan to make certain y'all have not used the same word repeatedly in the aforementioned judgement and paragraph. Use a thesaurus.
	Expect for and eliminate clichés.
2nd Revision 2 : Documentation
___ ___ ___ ___	Have you lot documented all your references?
	Have you used in text citations every time they were needed? Have you formatted all your citations correctly?
	Is your references' section complete and correct according to the JIBC APA Mode Guide.
2nd Revision 3 : Mechanics
___ ___	Bank check that all words and sentences are punctuated co-ordinate to standard usage.
	Check for spelling and typographical errors.
Third Revision: Content
___ ___ ___ ___	Read your essay aloud. Practice you believe what you have written?
	At this point do you develop your controlling idea in a way that makes sense?
	Have you provided enough background information? Is it relevant/necessary?
	Have you primarily used paraphrasing as opposed to direct quotations?

You should now be confident yous have produced a strong argument that is wonderfully constructed and that y'all volition be able to persuade your audience that your points and point of view are valid.

Key Takeaways

• During revising, you lot add together, cut, motility, or alter information in society to meliorate content.
• During editing, y'all have a second look at the words and sentences you used to express your ideas and fix any problems in grammer, punctuation, and sentence structure.
• Remember to budget time for careful editing and proofreading. Use all bachelor resources, including editing checklists, peer editing, and your institution'due south writing lab, to ameliorate your editing skills.
• Arrangement in a inquiry newspaper means that the argument gain logically from the introduction to the body to the decision. It flows logically from 1 point to the next. When revising a enquiry paper, evaluate the organization of the paper as a whole and the organization of individual paragraphs.
• In a cohesive research paper, the elements of the paper work together smoothly and naturally. When revising a research paper, evaluate its cohesion. In particular, check that information from research is smoothly integrated with your ideas.
• An effective research paper uses a style and tone that are appropriately academic and serious. When revising a research paper, cheque that the style and tone are consistent throughout.
• Editing a research paper involves checking for errors in grammar, mechanics, punctuation, usage, spelling, citations, and formatting.

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Source: https://opentextbc.ca/writingforsuccess/chapter/chapter-12-peer-review-and-final-revisions/

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